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Infinite Monkeys: "This post is for all the ladies. Every man that you know, has a secret plan for having sex with you. I know what you're thinking: 'Every man?' Well every straight man. 'Well, what about Larry in accounts payable? He's harmless.' Well, I hate to break the news to you, but Larry has a secret plan to have sex with you. He won't admit it to your face, but he has it all planned out.

Just to give an example. Take my co-worker N. I've worked with her for ten years. She's happily married. She has two kids. A house and all that stuff.

And I have a secret plan to have sex with her.

It involves us somehow getting stranded on desert island. And after a year of us being stranded-- and N. giving up all hope of ever getting rescued-- I have sex with her. Now, some of you might think that the odds of getting stranded on an island with N. is pretty big. And you'd be right. But the thing is, I have a plan if N. and I were stranded on a desert island together-- and it involves us having sex.

posted by The Chosen Monkey at 8:56 AM"

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